Monday, February 2, 2015

Even the Strongest Break

I broke. I've been putting on a brave front these past couple of days, convincing myself that I was alright. And then on Friday while I was in the shower, I cried. Like really cried. The kind that makes you cry so hard it gives you hiccups and your chest hurts. And then I performed the Asar prayer and cried to Him. So I guess the strongest breaks sometimes.

While having dinner tonight with hubs, I told him that this year we'll have our baby. And he smiled at me. He told me that the fact that we don't have a baby yet does not mean that it's not our rezeki. Well, not entirely. It's because God is testing us, to see how strong we are when faced with His tests. I reminded him that this is our fourth IVF fail, and he smiled at me and reminded me that it means that we're really strong then. My husband is a rock star.

In other news, I told a friend about our IVF fail and she said,"well it's not like you failed an exam." She is the shittiest of all shitheads. She is also now dead to me.


  1. Assalam...tabahkn hati ....saya faham perasaan sedih awk sebab sy pun dah alami 2x kegagalan dlm ivf. Betul ckp somi awk. Allah mnguji kita sebab Allah tahu kita kuat utk mnghadapinya..Jika sedih,menangislah...lpskan sgala perasaan sedih tu skrg..Bila dah reda bangkit kembali n jgn putus asa...ingatlh janji2 Allah bahawa pasti ada jalan bagi mereka yang berusaha. Moga satu masa nanti Allah rezeki kn kita dengan zuriat sendiri.. Insyaallah...

  2. I'm glad she is not ur friend anymore... u r better off without her... i think failing an exam would even close comparison to what we feel.

    Keep on being strong dear. my prayer for u... hugs...

    1. *i think failing an exam would not be even a close comparison to what we feel.


  3. I'm so sorry. People who aren't in the trenches just don't get it.